Name a time when you accepted something you knew was not true; yet you chose to overlook it and act as if it was.
Written by Dr. Merle Ray on December 21, 2018
Lesson 3 – Pondering Questions
Taking Off the Veils
Textbook: Spiritual Identity by Dr. Merle Ray
Instructions:
Please read the Introduction and then answer the question. Post your answers below by the requested due date. Reply also to the comments posted by your Corporate Sisters.
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Tanika Guidroz On September 11, 2020 at 10:39 pm
all the time with my husband. He lied so much, I didnt know when he was telling the truth or a lie. So, I just got use to the fact that everything that came out his mouth was lies. Plus, I would give him a lie so that I would feel better accepting the lie I believed. I know,,,,, its crazy..
Yolanda Perry On April 19, 2020 at 4:02 pm
I never forget the Lord show me an image of a bug and I dismiss the image. Then God instructed me not to be intimate with my Husband. I said that was not God speaking to me. I am married I can be intimate with my Husband that what married people do and I have a right. Little did I know that my husband was cheating on me. He gave me a sexual transmitted infection (STI). God was trying to protect me and I refuse to listen. Thank God it was curable and it is important to obey God, even when we don’t understand.
Jerrelyn Gaines On April 19, 2020 at 2:02 pm
Wow, this is really a good question. I thought of several lies that I believed and overlooked but narrowed them down to speak on the from my past. When I was in 10th grade, my dream after I completed high school was to attend LSU in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. In 12th grade, my high school counselor requested for me to come to her office so my teacher asked me to report to my counselor officer. In my counselor office, she shared that I had completed all the requirements for high school and to sign off on my paperwork. Attending my high school, I only met her twice and honestly I don’t remember her name or ever how she looks. After signing the paperwork, she said okay you can return to your class. She never asked what was my plans for after high school. My father wasn’t apart of my life. My mother had to work multiple jobs to provide for our family. My grandmother died when I was 13 years old and honestly my mom was in a depression and raising my brother and I to the best of her ability. Eventually, I buried my dream. Since developing an intimate relationship with my Heavenly Father and 30 plus years later, my dream has been resurrected. This week, I applied and was accepted into graduate school and look forward to achieving my education and career goals.
Dr. Merle Ray On April 19, 2020 at 4:11 pm
Woohoo!!! I’m screaming over here, Jerrelyn Gaines! Amen. Go forth! LSU is lucky to have you!
Deborah Stevens On April 19, 2020 at 9:24 pm
It is amazing how some voices ring louder than others. The truth you did not hear from hour high school counselor smothered the truth that God has/had for you.
Thank you for sharing.
Christie Mangum On April 19, 2020 at 1:03 pm
Several years ago I started dating a man that I thought was “the one” that I had been waiting for, praying for, my “prince charming”. When I first met him he was married so I left that alone right away and respected that. Years later I found out that he had been divorced and so I began to seek the opportunity through a mutual friend to hook up with him. To shorten the story, he called me out of the blue 1yr later but shortly after we spoke on the phone God showed me the truth about the guy and because I was so desperate to be with him I ignored it, knowing when God shows me something its 100%. I didn’t want to believe it. I ultimately was lied to, lost money, made plans only to be cheated and extremely hurt in the end. I found out that he was strung out on drugs and not doing as well as he appeared. The mutual friend didn’t even care to share this information with me and so I was hurt by this as well. I didn’t accept the truth because I thought I needed someone to fulfill an empty part of me that was only designed for God.
Dr. Merle Ray On April 19, 2020 at 4:13 pm
I admire your courage, Christie, to come forth out of that and on to God’s glory for your life!
Deborah Stevens On April 19, 2020 at 12:16 pm
For several years, I lived a lie believing that I could live destructively and not be affected. I lied to myself about choosing an alternative that would protect me and not hurt anyone else. I convinced myself that if I lived my truth, even if this truth was harmful and deceitful, I could not be hurt. This destruction led to many years of pain and isolation. I was not freed until I surrendered my life to Christ and owned my deceit. I have not allowed myself to think of this period in my life for many years.
Dr. Merle Ray On April 19, 2020 at 4:19 pm
Deborah, I commend you for sharing how you owned your deceit in that situation and life choice. Now that you have moved beyond the deceit, how will you own your destiny?
Deborah Stevens On April 19, 2020 at 7:00 pm
Good evening Dr. Ray. I have chosen to use the Word of God as the truth for me. The Word of God keeps me accountable.
Diana Williams On April 19, 2020 at 5:09 am
Several years ago, I met a man via the ER where I worked. While speaking to him I realized he was from Cleveland, TX and made mention that my grandparents where from Cleveland. He asked me their names, and I told him He immediately called my grandmother by her nickname. Which confirmed that He knew them. He immediately pulled his phone out of his pocket and called his mother. He proceeded to tell her that he had met me. His mother inquired about my grandparents, etc. and asked that I come see her. I told her I would. He proceeded to tell me that he had been diagnosed with a brain tumor, and that he was alone. He stated, he had not told his mother because she was up in age and didn’t want to worry her. He announced to me that he was a “Reverend” (self proclaimed I might add.), and had fallen from grace. He asked if I knew of anyone he could obtain counsel from. So, I recommended the possibility of him speaking to my Pastor for wise counsel. He agreed, and I scheduled the appt for him. They met, and he began to attend church with me. As, a result I thought I could trust him, especially after having met his mother who told me that my grandmother was a tremendous blessing to her family. At that particular time, I was ministering to a lot of young womeñ, one in particular who was like a daughter. She worked with me at the hospital. After a few months of him being around, I noticed that he was always whispering in her ear, and her attitude began to change. So, I confronted him and asked him if there was anything going on. He said No. He, stated that Melody (not her real name) had called him the night before because she and her boyfriend had an altercation the night prior). That’s why they were q
whispering, she didn’t want me to know. I called the young lady’s mother and asked her if she had noticed any changes in her daughter. She, replied yes, and stated she had voiced her concerns to her husband who stated she was over reacting. So, for a brief moment I dismissed it. A few weeks passed and the three of us, were on our way back to Houston and the Rev looked at me and said “you don’t reverence me.” Needless to say, * I was taken aback. I replied, who are you that I should reverence you? I began to distance myself, but I felt I needed to stay close to Melody though she was 24. I tried to convince her that he was not the individual he was protraying himself to be. By the end of the situation the Spirit of Jezebel had mastered his plan and I was left with these words. ” I play with the devil whenever I want and I always get what I want.” My life and that of my family as we knew it was left in ruins, but My Trust In God Was All The More Strengthened. His grace is Sufficient.
Tr
Deborah Stevens On April 19, 2020 at 9:26 pm
You strong, quiet assurance is magnified by your transparency. Thank you.
Dodie LaMott On April 19, 2020 at 1:11 am
I believe in life I have allowed people to take advantage of me , because my nature is and always have been to give and it’s ok to not receive anything in return. As a matter of fact I have condition my mind base on the word it is better to give than to receive as well as be a cheerful giver. I overlook this forever moment that it’s ok to say “No” and know that God is not mad at me because I didn’t ( loan you the money, or do what you ask). I have always aim to please and don’t want anyone to be without but at this time in my life I am recognizing that people do take you for granted and are so unappreciative.
My prayers is that I am at peace when I make any decision in life.
Dr. Merle Ray On April 19, 2020 at 8:09 am
Amen!
Deborah Stevens On April 19, 2020 at 9:29 pm
Really powerful. I think that many women hide behind this veil of generosity – even when we know we’re being used. There is freedom in saying “NO”!
Destinee Montgomery On April 18, 2020 at 9:25 pm
In the 9th grade at 14yrs old I begin to have feelings for a girl. I knew that wasn’t who I was but I accepted it and walked in it for 12 years. It wasn’t until I was sick and tired of walking and living the lie that I finally gave it up.
Dr. Merle Ray On April 18, 2020 at 10:16 pm
Powerful testimony.
LaShawn Darthard On April 18, 2020 at 2:04 pm
This is a great lesson. One in particular I can remember is being a part of a ministry that Holy Spirit reveals to me to get out. The leader took God’s Holy Word and used it to setup fear in the congregation. If we didn’t listen and do as God was leading us to do through him what would happen to us and even our families. “I don’t say this likely, but he was a false prophet”. The gift that was working through him belonged to God but God wasn’t pleased with his lifestyle and even with his heart. God reveal to me by saying directly to me, through dreams and through His true and living Word. It was a scary ordeal as a young woman because before it was all over everyone in that ministry was affected by the deceit of this leader. Losing their family, marriages, homes, jobs, self esteem, sanity, etc…. I learn a value lesson, when God shows you the truth, accept it.
LaShawn Darthard On April 18, 2020 at 2:11 pm
That’s why Dr Merle I can relate to this statement: It makes you wonder how many church leaders today are operating only in their gifts from God, while they leave character on the sideline? This speak volumes. My desire in what I do behind close doors or in front of open doors, is it pleasing in God’s eye sight?
Dr. Merle Ray On April 18, 2020 at 10:17 pm
Amen.
Evelyn Wilson On April 19, 2020 at 3:34 pm
I was working for a company where the the owners live out in another state the Owners a husband and wife team would fly in once a month for a week, after years of my working there I heard a rumor that they was going to close the company I wanted to find another job I was the office manger at that time as well as payroll manager signing all check along with the operational manager later the wife became ill with cancer owner called me and stated that if and when the company close I would not have to worry about working again. Deep down I knew it wasn’t true but I over looked it because I knew he needed me. shortly after that the operational manager died of cancer.Now the owner couldn’t come down anymore because the wife is to ill now I’am CFO and Office Manger I can’t leave. The wife dies and he moves the Company to yet another state where he and a friend join their 2 companies because his friend need help I go for 4 months to train new people but I wouldn’t move. In the end he says that the company has no money so nothing for me ……….But I know that GOD will not forget your label of love.
Dr. Merle Ray On April 19, 2020 at 4:07 pm
Wow, Evelyn! How has that story demoralized you, or set up destructive behaviors in you that destroy who you are created to be? What did you do in response to what happened?
Jacqueline Williams On April 12, 2020 at 7:42 pm
When I was in the 4th grade, after all our testing, I was placed 23rd out of maybe 30 students in my class. Before that I was always placed to the top of my class. I remember before the results was announced my classmates expected that I was going to be in the top 3. When it was announced that I was 23rd I remember the shame I felt because of my classmates and my expectation of myself.
When I took my report card home to my parents, my father looked at it and said out loud, “My baby came 3rd in class” and he rewarded me with $5. My siblings said to me, “You know that you didn’t placed 3rd but 23rd. I responded, “My Daddy said I came 3rd.”
Somehow, I knew that my father in his efforts to make me feel good said I came 3rd. We never discussed it and I never corrected him and said, “No Daddy I didn’t come 3rd but 23rd.” I played along.
Subconsciously because of that occurrence I developed my own irrational belief systems that governed my life until maybe 4 years ago.
I knew what the truth was, and because my dad didn’t accept and told my truth, I didn’t trust anyone to tell me the truth when it came to my life. So, I developed a mistrust of people telling me the truth. People would complement me and my work and it will go in one ear and out the other. My rationale was that they were just saying good things to make me feel good.This is crazy but I remember I wrote a paper in Seminary and my Professor gave me a grade of “A- “. I remember thinking and saying, “He probably gives A’s to everyone, only to find out that this Professor hardly ever gives A’s.
I also developed a fear of failure that governed my life. I didn’t deal well with failure and failed to participate in a lot of things because I didn’t want to fail.
The only voice I listened to for most of my life was my own because I didn’t trust others to tell me the truth. I was very hard on myself and gave myself no room to fail. I underestimated my abilities and never appreciated or celebrated my accomplishments.
I thank God for bringing awareness to and for delivering me from my irrational belief systems and renewing me in the spirit of my mind. It is an ongoing process. There is no failure in God, I get to take the test over and over until I get it. I now give myself permission to mess up realizing i will be forever learning. I now listen to the council of others, and most of all I’m learning to trust the voice of God My Heavenly Father.
Sharron Austin On April 11, 2020 at 3:26 pm
When I excepted the lies from this guy at time we’re just dating he lying to me about his telephone relationship it went on for months, I forgave him ended up marrying him because I excepted the fact that he said he was done he cursed her out but little to my knowledge on the way to marry me he held a i
one hour conversation with one of them
Teressa Simmons On April 11, 2020 at 1:19 pm
I had an unhealthy and ungodly relationship with an older woman in a church I attended years ago. She was controlled by the spirit of Jezebel. I did not know it at the time, but the Holy Spirit was telling me to disconnect from her. However, because she was called Dr., Prophet, and Evangelist by my Pastor at the time and because he would often give her the mic to speak and let her use his property, I just believed she was authentic. I did not know at the time God was warning me. When I went to pray alone, I would hear a voice say do not talk to her, do not call her, do not answer the phone. I did not think it was God because everyone was embracing her, she was on the news, and she was a Christian. I thought it was the devil trying destroy the relationship we had. So God allowed trouble and affliction to set chasten me every time I connected with her. I began to cry out to Him for help and He opened my eyes and ears and I began to see, hear, taste, touch, and feel the spirit operating through her. I almost lost my life but God rescued me and gave me the courage to sever the cord of witchcraft with this woman. I rebuked her and commanded her to let me go. I told her that I would never talk to her again and I hung up the phone with her yelling at me (1 Cor. 10:12-13). I learned a valuable lesson from that relationship. When GOD tells you to disconnect from someone, DO IT, or it may cost you your life and ministry. After I cut the cord with this woman, I came across an article about her on the internet. Her reputation in the area and nation was destroyed. I forgave her, myself, and my Pastor and his wife at the time. I saw this same sister years later and spoke to her peaceably as I greeted her in the grocery store. She was not the same woman physically or spiritually. There is a scripture that says only with your eyes will you behold and see the reward of the wicked (Ps 91:8). It is impossible for GOD to lie!
Juanita Robinson On April 10, 2020 at 11:03 am
After the death of my brother, I moved back to New Orleans to help my mother. Yet still longing for her love since a child. I’ve always been misunderstood and told why couldn’t I be like my brother. I use to be outspoken but I never seem to fit in anywhere and as a child I was silenced. I just wanted to be accepted and loved by my mother and from time to time asked GOD why she couldn’t love me. I chose to overlook the dart of her and a few very close to my brother who spoke GOD should’ve took me instead of him. I chose to suppress, overlook and act as if things had changed. I just couldn’t believe once again yearning for Love that my FATHER gives me from HIMSELF and through others. I accepted the darts through the joking form acting as if it didn’t really hurt, BUT GOD who continue to heal, deliver, and make me free as I will forgive until it hurt no more.
Kimberly Thompson On March 27, 2020 at 8:55 pm
Definitely the distancing that was occurring between me and my ex. I accepted it as we were both getting older and pursing our own interests, that he was experiencing depression due to surgery and his bout with cancer – but in reality he was out cheating (didn’t know at the time) and I was drowning myself in work acting as if we were OK, that we were just going to ride out this marriage b/c we had been married 24 years, there was no way we would break up now. Even when I found out the truth, I didn’t want to believe it. The few people that did know could’t tell because I went to work and acted “normal” The told me they had no clue because I didn’t act like I was going through a divorce. Hiding behind a veil – a wall of hurt, pain, devastation yet pretending on the outside I was ok, strong but on the inside, I was deteriorating, crying out to Father to help me live another day.
brendab On March 27, 2020 at 7:51 pm
With my first marriage, when my ex told me that he was off drugs and was ready to change only to be lied to again and putting my children in danger
Kimberly Thompson On March 27, 2020 at 6:27 pm
Definitely the distancing that was occurring between me and my ex. I accepted it as we were both getting older and pursing our own interests, that he was experiencing depression due to surgery and his bout with cancer – but in reality he was out cheating (didn’t know at the time) and I was drowning myself in work acting as if we were OK, that we were just going to ride out this marriage b/c we had been married 24 years, there was no way we would break up now. Even when I found out the truth, I didn’t want to believe it. The few people that did know could’t tell because I went to work and acted “normal” The told me they had no clue because I didn’t act like I was going through a divorce. Hiding behind a veil – a wall of hurt, pain, devastation yet pretending on the outside I was ok, strong but on the inside, I was deteriorating, crying out to Father to help me live another day.
Barbara Crater On March 27, 2020 at 5:51 pm
I excepted a lie that a friend girl was not going after other men and breaking up families because she was my friend. I over looked it because I didn’t want to believe she would do it to me as her friend. Wrong. Thank God it was caught before any tragedy.